I continue to do this to myself

Neither outside nor inside

I'm not safe

I can't trust my own instincts

I keep telling myself I'm not afraid

But I'm scared to death

There is always something there

A sound, a smell, a shadow, whispering voices

It's all so real in my head

I know that reality hurts and I'm afraid of myself

Afraid of losing control, afraid of letting go

So I lock myself up and suffer in silence

I repeat this goddamn pattern over and over again

I force myself to relive every nightmare, every drama

And I continue to do this to myself just to survive another day

An empty word without meaning

Blood is not thicker than water.

Family a word without meaning

It creates nothing but chaos and suffering.

Why is everyone so selfish?

Empty words empty promises! lies after lies

Instead of helping, they trigger everything

Please don't make this worse! the nightmares are real

You say you can't remember but I can't forget

You make your bed now sleep in it

Family doesn't mean shit to me it's just an empty word without meaning