Morning! sleep becomes less and less.
Trying in every way not to show not to react.
Feels like the Joker a fake smile a fake laugh.
But inside I break my thoughts the pictures I see
All memories every year. I remember everything
I can not forget or forgive everything that has been said and done
I'm a disaster a minefield a ticking bomb.
A danger to myself. Afraid of my own thoughts
The fear of all repressed and trapped memories.
Fear of losing control. Fear I'll not have the strength
To resist the inner struggle to take me through the day.
I hit myself hurting myself to relieve the pain
The anxiety panics the constant flashbacks
Of physical and mental abuse
Wounds so deep so emotionally damaged.
I'm a disaster a minefield a ticking bomb.
When everything collapses!
Where everything is repeated over and over again.
I hear the words I see his blank stare there is nothing left.
No light no joy. Just an empty figure so abandoned
So closed and emotionally cold. A scary and dark reality.
An icy cold an tormented and lost soul abandoned left.
In a place where no light reaches the darkness has taken hold.
So helpless so lost locked up and isolated
A society that does not see, understand or hear his cry for help.
Who is that staring at me Blood red eyes a soulless smile so familiar!! So twisted and tormented I see the fear, the scars, the smell of dec...
