A sad excuse

Empty tears bloodshot eyes

I can't get them out I can't hold them in

I have lost the ability to ventilate

I closed down, turned off all human feelings

It was the only way I knew how to get through the night

I painted a picture of a perfect world where no one could hurt me

But the only person I was hurting was myself

I sacrificed my feelings to survive I buried them so deep inside

So Afraid to let go of opening it up

Terrified, paralysed, afraid that it will be the end of me

I can't let go I'm scared, alone so cold and empty

It's just me, a sad excuse of a human being