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söndag 8 november 2020

Historien upprepar sig om och om igen!!


Jag önskar att det var synligt

Att alla kunde se kaosen all ångest all inre stress

Jag önskar att alla skulle förstå och acceptera det dom inte förstår

Att ha en dold handikapp är inte enkelt i dagens värld

Där alla ska vara och fungera på samma sätt

Passa in smälta in följa en rak linje vara en kopia buga och be

Jag önskar att världen var en bättre plats 

Där all var accepterade för dom dom är

Men Historien upprepar sig om och om igen!!

Det är skrämmande att se att mänskligheten aldrig lär sig

Jag önskar bara att alla hade rätten att vara den dom är

lördag 7 november 2020

I'm well aware of what the problem is and it's not me!!


Waking up with the suites from yesterday!

Shaking legs no strength I try to get up.

My head throbs my whole body aches

No balance no coordination the heart beats double beats.

Heavy breathing blurred vision. Lack of energy

legs that can barely carry me I am so physically drained !!

That I can barely stand, there is no energy left

So tired of trying to be understood

When still no one listens or hears what you are trying to say

Where everyone always tries to explain to me 

That what I feel how I think what creates my anxiety

That I do not understand myself  that I'm wrong

I probably understand more about myself than anyone else

I'm well aware of what the problem is and it's not me

Open your fucking eyes and see that you're ruining his life!!


Fear anxiety the constant panic!

Can not eat sleep or get any rest or break at all.

I see him I hear his screams. I see how he takes his life

Trapped and isolated in a dark room.

So helpless so lonely so abandoned and lost.

A broken child crushed by a society that does not see or understand.

That fear anxiety, and the constant panic slowly but surely takes his life.

Open your fucking eyes and see that you're ruining his life

RIght now!

What the hell !

Who is that staring at me Blood red eyes a soulless smile so familiar!! So twisted and tormented I see the fear, the scars, the smell of dec...

I am what i am!